Our particles found each other
by Petit97
Summary: Lenny during the season 9 of The Big Bang Theory. What's gonna happen with Leonard and Penny? Are they getting divorced already? If not, how is married life gonna be? Where are they going to live? And, more important, how are they gonna deal with that girl Leonard kissed? [I do not own The Big Bang Theory or anything related. It's all CBS] Please review; I hope you guys enjoy it.
1. Chapter 1 - The Matrimonial Momentum

Most of the times, craziness lead to wrong decisions, but you can't spent your entire life without taking any risks. There's no fun in that. Some couples spend months planning their weddings step by step, minute by minute and in less than a year, they are already divorces. However, some couples just do it: get in a car, drive to that small church in the pouring rain and their marriage lasts forever. Whether you have a big planned wedding or a small ceremony with four people, that's not what makes it last. It's about trust, love and commitment.

Leonard fell for Penny the moment she walked through his building. First, because of her looks but then because of the little things: the way she smiles, her honesty, her strength and every single thing about her. For Penny, it was a little harder. First, he was just a very sweet guy, a good neighbor and an amazing friend. After a little while, he became the cute nerd with a crush on her. That crush became mutual and they fell in love. They fought, broke up and got back together. Now, they are happily – at least for the most part – engaged and only a few steps from the big day.

Of course weddings aren't simple or easy. They have to plan every single second and considerate all the possibilities, good or bad. But sometimes the pressure is so big that a couple start to joke about dropping everything and just running away. Well, that's exactly what Leonard and Penny did.

\- Wow, there's a Denny's in Vegas you can actually get married in.

\- Doesn't sound very romantic. Yeah, but we could get heart-shaped pancakes.

\- I'm sure we'll find a decent chapel.

\- Yeah.

After that talk, there were two distinct possibilities: number one, they laugh and just let the idea fade away as a joke; number two, they stare at each other for a moment and, almost synchronized, get up and make a run for it. Penny and Leonard choose number two.

\- This is crazy!

\- I know!

\- You think people are gonna be mad?

\- Maybe. But this isn't about them, it's about us.

\- It is. It is about us.

That's just amazing. Their hearts were skipping beats, that was it. No regrets, no comebacks. In a few hours they were gonna be **married** for real and that was really scary. But I guess that if you have the love of your life by your side, there's nothing to be scared of. _Right?_ **Wrong**. Even when happiness looks to be ahead of you, if you start to look you'll definitely find something to hold your back and change your mind. Sometimes you suddenly get inexplicably annoyed by the way he or she brushes their teeth, but sometimes is so more complicated than that…

\- Uh, well, there... there's one thing I feel I should tell you. - When Penny heard those words from Leonard in the car on their way to get married she finally felt that scare.

\- What?

\- You know, so we can go into this with no secrets between us.

\- What?

\- Remember, uh, a couple years back when I was on that research ship in the North Sea?

\- Yeah.

\- Okay, well, there... there was a lot of drinking and craziness going on...

\- No, you told me.

\- Okay, um… Well, there was this girl. - Penny lost her track of time. She had no idea how much time passed during that conversation, but it has one of the hardest things she ever had to hear.

\- What did you do?

\- Nothing… - She wanted to believe in Leonard, for real, but that's not how feelings work. You can't just turn it off and pretend it's not hurting anymore. - Really. It was just kissing.

\- And then what?

\- And then nothing. - "Oh my God, why didn't him just told me before or not told me at all? He just made it a damn big deal", Penny thought. - I stopped it. But it still bothers me, and… I wanted you to know.

\- All right. - Penny really wished to say something else, she tried to tell Leonard it was fine, it wasn't bothering her at all, but it'd be a lie. She was devastated and lost wanting everything to just stop but her mouth was opening and closing and no words were coming out.

Leonard asked her what he could do to make things better, but she didn't know how would fix things or even if there was a way to fix. How do you get over something like that? Cheating is still cheating; distance, loss, loneliness, revenge… there is no excuse whatsoever. And the place Penny was feeling more hurt was heart because she was ready to give it to Leonard, but now she had doubts.

They got to Vegas and the wedding was still on. Penny wasn't talking about what happened e Leonard wouldn't push it. They went through with it. The ceremony went on and it was as good as a Vegas wedding can be.

 _"Penny, we are made of particles that have existed since the moment the universe began. I like to think those atoms traveled 14 billion years through time and space to create us, so that we could be together and make each other whole."_

Leonard's vows were so beautiful that, for a moment, Penny forgot everything about that stupid talk in the car. For a single moment all she could feel was the joy of being loved for such a kind man. She tried her best to say something "mushy", but it wasn't that good. Leonard didn't care; for him, getting to walk with Penny in his arms as his _wife_ was all he really needed to be happy.

Unfortunately, their honeymoon ended before it even started. Leonard did carry Penny through the door, but the magic stopped the moment they kissed in what was supposed to be their perfect night… She couldn't kiss him and not imagine some random girl making out with Leonard. That was hard on her, more than she could imagine.

Was that gonna be the end of their marriage? Before it even started?

Well, they headed back to Pasadena, but they didn't go _home_ , because that's was an unknown place for now. Penny went to her apartment and Leonard went to his. Each one followed their separate ways, opposite sides of the hallway, together but apart. How long was that gonna last? That was a really difficult question that neither of them knew how to answer.

Penny was trying to find a way in her head to forgive Leonard, but every second was just getting harder. If it wasn't bad enough, Sheldon mentioned the girl his roommate had an adventure with worked with them. That only made things worse.

"In top of everything, how could he not tell me that? I was convinced that was just a kiss, now I'm not so sure. Oh Leonard, you drive me crazy", Penny was sitting on the couch, trying to figure out her next step. She fell asleep after a couple hours. Maybe the next day had something better for her.. Maybe.

In the apartment 4A, Leonard kept rolling in bed and going trough everything that happened in the night he kissed the girl. Then he started thinking about the talk in the car. "Oh my God, I'm so stupid. How can someone so smart do something so stupid?". He didn't know what to do. He thought about going over there and talking to Penny, but what would he say? There wasn't a right or easy answer for his problem. Then, he cried himself to sleep.


	2. Chapter 2 - The Separation Oscillation

Having someone to love and being loved back can be both the best and worst thing to happen in a person's life. The best because during the time spent together will provide the happiest memories and the worst because when you have your heart broken is gonna hurt more than a bullet to the chest.

A hole in the heart is like broken glass: you can try to glue it back together in many different ways, however, it is never gonna be the same. Leonard knew and believed that was true, but he wasn't gonna let Penny go without trying. That problem was making his sleep even harder. He was a having a recurrent dream in which Sheldon suggested the best idea for Penny to forget his betrayal was her to kiss other guy and then she and Sheldon just made out in front of Leonard. It was driving him crazy.

Penny wasn't very happy herself. She did want Leonard back, she wanted them to start their married life but nothing seemed to be working towards their happiness. Unfortunately, her husband was feeling like that as well and decided to contact a divorce lawyer. He didn't say it was his final decision, but even considering that possibility was very dangerous for the future and success of the marriage.

She invited Amy and Bernadette over to have a talk and get some different opinions. They made her realize how much he had changed since they met. Leonard was definitely cockier and most self assured. But also, if he was with her is because he loves not because she is the only option he had. She really liked that point of view and when Amy said Penny shouldn't let a moment of weakness ruin the relationship was also true; the betrayal wasn't gonna be forgotten but it wasn't worth losing Leonard for that. She really wanted them to get over that sad chapter and start to live as a true happily married couple.

...

\- Leonard, are you there? - Penny knocked on his apartment door.

\- Yes, come in.

\- I really want us to talk.

They both sit on the couch and Penny takes the lead in the conversation.

\- Look, I'm really sorry I told you I was okay with everything before the wedding. I shouldn't have done that, but I didn't know what to say or do.

\- I know, and I can't apologize enough. I wish I knew what to tell you now.

After moments of talk and silence, they've reached a decision: since Leonard was going to work side by side with the girl everyday, if Penny met her, maybe she would accept the reality a little bit easier. Leonard went ahead and talked with Mandy about his problem; he didn't get the result he expected but learned something even more important.

\- Hi Mandy.

\- Hi Leonard.

\- Do you mind if I seat?

\- No, not at all.

\- So, I wanted to talk about you about what happened in the boat

\- I'm not sure I follow.

\- We kissed? - For a second his pride was hurt due to Mandy's lack of memory.

\- Oh no. Did I sleep with you, too? - She said with a bit of terror in her voice.

\- No. We just kissed.

\- Thank God. Lucky me! - Now Leonard was pissed, but that wasn't his focus.

\- Listen, the reason I'm here is I told my wife about the kiss because I wanted to start the marriage with no secrets and since we work together, she would feel better if she knew you aren't a threat or something like that.

Mandy hysterically laughed and stopped when she realized Leonard was actually being serious.

\- You know, it was just a kiss. Are you sure that's the only reason you told her? To me, seems like you're trying to sabotage the relationship.

Leonard had some sort of enlightenment in that moment and realized Mandy was right. He called Penny immediately:

\- Hi, it's me. Listen, I've figure some things out and I really want us to talk again. Dinner tonight?

\- Sure. See you later. Bye.

…

\- So, here is the thing: I never believed I deserved a woman like you because you are so beautiful. I mean, you can have any guy you want and yet, somehow, here we are together. I've been thinking about and you were right; I was trying to sabotage our wedding. After all this years we've been together, a day doesn't go by without me thinking that you'll find someone better than me. I really don't think I deserve you.

\- Well, that's just lame! But, I understand you and I must confess I know how you feel. You spend so much time worrying about you not deserving me; the truth is, I wonder the same. I'm always scared you'll leave me for someone more like you. And I guess my overreaction was my way of sabotaging our wedding.

\- So let's just be together. Leave all the scare behind.

\- That sounds like a good plan.

Leonard got on his knees and took Penny's hand.

\- Penny Hofstadter, will you stay married to me?

\- Absolutely.

They kissed and went to the bedroom, in order to finally officiate their wedding.

…

In the morning after, the couple received a wedding gift from Sheldon: a weekend way in San Francisco. The fact Sheldon included himself on the trip wasn't ideal but Penny and Leonard would figure something out soon enough.

All the problems seemed to be faded away for the couple, but unfortunately the same couldn't be said about Bernadette. She was freaking out because she knew about Leonard and Mandy since his return and when Penny finds out, things weren't going to be pretty. Will their friendship survive this hit? And what Amy has to say about the subject?

The couple will have a couple of days of just sun and shine, but when Leonard receives a call back from the divorce lawyer, new problems will rise in the Hofstadter's new life. Penny won't be satisfied to learn her husband was ready to give up so easily on them.


End file.
